This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
