we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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