We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
