New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
