It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
