im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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