just come out here and I will go home with you...
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i will never coherently bang her
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize