Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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