How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
