I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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