I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize