Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
only you would photoshop your dick
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
