Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
