And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
