If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
