do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
