Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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