New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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