you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
