Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
