5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
