At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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