I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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