grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
