Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
