Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
