dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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