you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
