I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
