let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
