Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
