South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
