Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize