im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
