In the future we'll all be gay
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
