She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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