We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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