I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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