seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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