My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
