What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
