idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
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