Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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