thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
