I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize
