i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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