i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
