She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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