Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
