my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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